Twice my age and from Scotland.
smoky, full-bodied and leaves you gasping a little.
left in an oak barrel for at least 3 years, with very little oxygen
nowhere near my genitals
kinda funny when english teachers say stuff like “i can tell if you didnt read the book” or “i can tell when people bs their paper”
no you cant. you can tell when people are bad at bs-ing their paper. i didnt even read the sparknotes and i barely skimmed the wikipedia and you gave me an A. you kneel before my throne unaware that it was born of lies
“YOU KNEEL BEFORE MY THRONE UNAWARE THAT IT WAS BORN OF LIES” IS ONE OF THE GREATEST SENTENCES I’VE EVER READ AND I CAN’T FUCKING BELIEVE IT’S ON A POST ABOUT BULLSHITTING ON ASSIGNMENTS.
someone: haha why are you so obsessed with *insert show/book series/film/etc)
me, internally: because throwing myself into something allows me to briefly forget the constant depression misery and sadness i suffer through every day and when i marathon things my self hatred sometimes starts to disappear because i forget that i’m a real person who exists in the real world. my obsessions help me to cope when i feel like i’m about to explode or cry or scream or all of those at once and once i get into something i barely think of anything else for weeks which is a very unhealthy coping tactic but hey it helps so
me: haha idk :))
Cheesecake: What is your favourite sweet treat?
Pound Cake: A picnic on a summer’s day with all your favourite treats or a rainy day in a cozy coffee shop with a book?
Chocolate Fudge Cake: What song can always make you dance/feel good?
Strawberry Shortcake: Name five of your favourite fictional characters.
Vanilla Cake: How do you spend a lazy, rainy day?
Coconut Cake: A lazy, beautiful tropical paradise or a busy, wondrous city?
Angelfood Cake: Tell us a cringey childhood story.
Chocolate Cake: What was the last movie you saw? Did you enjoy it? Why?
Red Velvet Cake: Name your ultimate guilty pleasure.
Ice-cream Cake: What is your go-to ice-cream order (toppings included!)?
Princess Cake: Name some of the things you wanted to be when you grew up.
Fairy Cake: If you could live in one imaginative land (eg: from a book, movie, etc), where would it be and why?
Mooncake: What is your Chinese zodiac sign (eg: Year of the Rooster, etc)?
Carrot Cake: What does someone have to do to get you to be their friend?
Birthday Cake: What is on your birthday wishlist?
Victorian Sponge Cake: You are at a shop that sells body lotions, soaps, shower gel, etc in lots of different smells. What scented lotion do you get?
Lemon Cake: What/who makes you smile the most?
Coffee Cake: How do you usually take your coffee/tea?
Italian Cream Cake: Name five of your top travel destinations.
Every url that reblog’s will be written in a book and shown to my homophobic dad.
